Tag: optimism

The Need for Change

Change can be scary sometimes, especially if there is an unknown future. However, for some reason, I absolutely love change. Yes, I still get the anxious feeling when there’s uncertainty in how things will change, but in general, I am quite comfortable with it. I am writing this post for those of you who have a hard time with change and would like to know how some people manage it.

I learned to adapt at a young age.

I think my comfort with change comes from moving to a few different towns growing up. I would have to get used to a new room in a new house in a new neighbourhood and go to a new school with new people. Then once I was in university, I would have a new living space a few times a year – from dorms to my parent’s house to an apartment back to my parents house, to a basement suite to a upper level rental and back to my parent’s house.

I got used to moving around so much that I found it difficult to stay in one place, almost as if I needed more stimulation. I randomly decided to move to Kelowna so I would be forced to learn a whole new way of living. I’ve already lived in 4 different places in the 4 years that I’ve been here, and with each place I’ve managed to adapt to it and make a new routine.

I couldn’t imagine permanently settling down in a house… If I ever do that, I’m sure I would be doing some sort of renovation every couple of years as I would need a change of scenery.

I have a wild imagination.

I think that having a creative, imaginative mind has a hard time sticking to the same routine, schedule, and surroundings for long periods of time. I enjoy having variety in my life and can get bored easily if I’ve had the same routine for a while. This eventually causes me to try something new, after having a pity party that nothing is interesting anymore.

I’m still trying to understand myself, because sometimes it causes me to make impulsive decisions and I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not. I mean, the easiest way for something to change is to take a risk and see what happens, right?

I am open-minded.

Since I’ve seen many different ways of living and have learned to adapt to them, I have developed an open mind. I like to listen and understand others’ point of view and thoughts. For those that I don’t agree with, I still try to rationalize why they might think that way to avoid conflict and arguments. This can be both a blessing and a curse – yes, it makes it easier to get along with people and be likable, but it also causes me to be vulnerable to getting hurt by people who take advantage of my passive approach.

That being said, I believe being open-minded is the easiest way to adapt to change. If you have a hard time doing this, try to switch from judgement and assumptions to taking a moment to look at a situation with a different angle. You are not always right.

No matter what, change will cause personal growth.

I have to admit – the adult life has definitely made the feeling of change a lot more difficult. I have developed an absurd level of anxiety that I am learning how to manage. I never used to be this way, and was always open to new things. I can now understand how others who aren’t so used to change might feel. It’s a lot more comfortable having a certain level of security.

That being said, despite how I think about the world now, I still remain optimistic about change. It might be more of an emotional struggle than it used to be, but I always come out on the positive side of things and look forward to a new future. I think the only way we can be comfortable with change is to be grateful about the past, and to find the positive things about the future and be excited to learn something new about yourself.

I think it’s important to see who you are in different situations, because you may just surprise yourself. Maybe you find out what you’re not good at, what you don’t like, and who you can’t get along with, but that is still a move in the right direction. We focus so much on making the right move to see what we are good at, do something we like, and be around people that become our best friends – but we only learn to appreciate these things by experiencing the opposite.

Change is inevitable.

Life will constantly change and there’s nothing we can do to stop it. Whether it’s a slow, gradual change, a quick abrupt change, intentional or not, we will be forced to adapt and move forward. As long as you trust yourself that you will be okay, you will certainly be able to figure out a new way of survival and thrive.

Take Advantage of Quarantine

If you are laid off like me, or at least have reduced hours due to COVID-19, take advantage of this time you have to yourself. Yes, it’s easy to get stuck in the rut of fearing what the future might look like, but it’s likely to get back to normal, or at least a “new” normal. I have been surprised to hear from quite a few friends that they secretly are loving this time. I think right now everyone is feeling obligated to be stressed out and hoping things will get back to normal, but it’s totally okay to actually enjoy the “break” from your normally fast-paced life. If anything, I think what we learn from being in quarantine will actually help us in the long run. Let me tell you why.

1. Spending less money

For us, we are saving a ton of money just by cooking at home. We usually go to a restaurant to eat at least once a week, especially when our sports leagues are up and running. Yes, it’s still possible to order in right now, but our problem was we went just to get a different environment, be around people, and to get out of the house. Now that we can’t do that, we are forced to cook at home. This is something that will teach us that it is easier than we thought to make things homemade and prepare meals ahead of time.

We are also not driving as much since we can’t go and visit friends and family and thus saving money on gas. Obviously we miss being able to do this but the upside is saving the money. Again, on road trips we would usually stop and get food along the way as well.

We are unable to go to the movies, go bowling, or any recreational center so we need to depend on other things for entertainment. I think this will really benefit us in the future for when we are bored and need something else for entertainment. We have tried a bit harder for watching movies at home, making “nests” and homemade snacks instead of going to the theatre. We have also been filming YouTube videos as a source of entertainment which we are having a lot of fun with, and it’s something that we would have never done before. I think in the future we will try harder to work with what we have and think twice about spending our money on food and entertainment.

2. Planning ahead

This mostly has to do with getting groceries. Normally, we would have to go a few times a week because we would be craving something, or forgot things for the meals we want to make, or ran out of something that we didn’t expect to. Now that we are trying to only get groceries once or twice a month, it takes a bit more planning ahead. It turns out that it’s not that time consuming and it’s pretty easy. We look at everything that we have already, and think of meals around that.

We are getting much better at using what we have instead of loading up our pantry and forgetting about half of what is already in there. We are also more cognizant about how long fresh food can last and how we can make the most out of it. I hate to admit it, but an example I have is with spinach, we would use it a lot at first, forget about it for a few days, then it would get all wilted and we would throw it out. Now, if it’s starting to get a bit old, we have just been freezing it so we can use it later for spaghetti sauce or casseroles. I’m sure this sounds like a no-brainer to most people, but we honestly just didn’t pay enough attention to what was in our fridge.

There are also a few things we have figured out how to make last longer, such as growing store-bought green onions in water, or storing asparagus or celery in water will make them last longer too. We have learned how to make your own kombucha and sauerkraut, and have pre-made snacks that can be stored in the freezer.

3. Relaxing

Sometimes without trying, I’m sure that everyone ends up with a busy schedule. With work, recreational activities, meeting up with friends, baby shower invites, birthdays, meetings, phone calls, along with household tasks and trying to squeeze in your own hobbies – it’s easy to forget to slow down.

At first it was a bit shocking to go from 100 to 0 in a matter of a few days, but now that I’m settling in, I have found ways to take “me” time that I never gave myself before. Whether it’s cooking or baking something I never have before, colouring or painting, looking back at my old travel pictures, or doing yoga, I am realizing that I have been neglecting both my mind and body from what it needs. Of course, this is from the perspective of someone with no kids and no pets to worry about – that would be a different story.

Usually on my days off while I’m working, I am constantly thinking of what I should be doing to be productive. I am used to completely exhausting my mind by the end of the day to the point that all it can handle is watching TV. My boyfriend would quite often say, “you’ve done a lot, you don’t need to do everything in one day, just relax for the rest of the day.” This is something that I just couldn’t listen to. You could argue that it’s good to be busy to get ahead in life… but this also leads to spreading yourself too thin to the point of burnout.

I have found enough to keep me busy that I feel productive, but I have also allowed myself the time to breath especially now that I have so much more free time in my day. It actually feels wonderful giving that time to myself, and I feel like a better, happier version of myself instead of a stressed out stress ball that’s anxious all the time. I will definitely be more mindful of how I’m treating myself in the future.

4. Time to reflect on life

This sounds deep, I know. I think it’s important to notice what you take for granted every day, what isn’t working in your life, and what you’d like to work on for the future. Like I said before, I have learned that it is much more fun to not stress about everything and to dive into self-care. I also wrote a blog on being a creator and not a consumer, which I have been taking very seriously now. I didn’t realize how much I was consuming – on my phone particularly – outside of work. In the first couple days of quarantine I didn’t really know what to do with myself so I would just go between watching videos and scrolling through memes. I made the decision to delete some apps and took up some hobbies that I could do instead. I think this made a world of difference on keeping my mind busy in a more positive way.

I hope that despite the circumstances, you are able to take this time for yourself and make minor improvements for your day to day life. Now is the time to reflect on your values, make some positive changes, and exercise your creativity in the process.